Please take a moment to absorb the depths of the title of this post. Perfectionism is an Illusion. Now, get up from where you’re sitting and look in the mirror. Hopefully you have a laptop because I’d like to come with you. If not, write or memorize the following words to speak aloud while glancing at your reflection. “I will make mistakes, I will not always have my happy ending for each and every moment. I will give myself permission to be happy regardless. I know we are all made different and I will accept that. I will strive to become the absolute best version of myself daily, no longer comparing myself to someone else.” Finally, smile at that beautiful person staring back at you.
Trust me. Do it. Don’t laugh it off. You can laugh, but don’t turn away.
Remember last year I told you that self-talk is a necessity? It wasn’t a jest. The inner peace you can discover while you’re doing mini talk sessions is unimaginable. Obsessing over image is unhealthy, but trying to be healthy is great. Know this: beauty is subjective. Exhibit A: You know how you find that one guy or girl more attractive than your friends do? Exhibit B: You’ve been crushing on that “weird looking fella” and you don’t know why. Here’s a hint: he’s beautiful to you. A perfect smile, being a certain size, having a particular hairstyle won’t make you or break you. If it makes you feel better, by all means – do it. But having been down that road and on my down days occasionally teetering on it, it doesn’t always help to have fulfilled them. It is all state of mind. Not all things found on the surface can cure the condition within. In my opinion, the world is financed by our disdain for ourselves (both young and mature) and fuels the fatalistic emotions we eventually feel because that other guy or girl has the “perfect” [fill in the blank], and we don’t.
But perfectionism isn’t always about appearances.
Trying to make the grade and not getting it doesn’t make you a failure, it means you have to take a new approach to studying. It is not the end of the world. It feels like it. I’ve been there. That feeling will past. Are you a writer? Still trying to make that chapter perfect, or is it procrastination? (Yes, I know it could be writer’s block too, don’t sass me haha.) Don’t let perfectionism disturb your ability to reach your greatest potential and complete the task at hand.
During our lives we will be told how to think, what actions to take, what’s in good taste, what isn’t, how to carry ourselves, and so on. Stop relying on that shxt. Stop buying into that which will only hinders you. What is your version of success and how can you “win”? What is your interpretation of right and wrong? You are your own person, so be that magnificent person. Think your own thoughts and cherish your own truth…as long as it is positive. ❤
Dare to change your mindset. The reflection you see of the world is controlled by the thoughts you have, more than the reality of it. Trust in your ability to convert the unpleasantness surrounding you into uplifting energy.